Meow Meow

We are investigating issues affecting the hairball detectors (down) and laser pointer tracker (degraded performance). Our team is actively working to restore normal service.

May 14, 2026

2 months ago

API Unavailable

Resolved · May 14 at 5:32 PM (UTC) (in 10 minutes)

The issue has been resolved. Server infrastructure has been restored and the API is now operational.

Investigating · May 14 at 5:23 PM (UTC) (10 minutes earlier)

We are currently experiencing an API outage due to physical damage to server infrastructure. Our team is investigating and working to restore service.

Apr 29, 2026

3 months ago

Cats have taken over the servers

Resolved · April 30 at 7:15 PM (UTC) (in 1 day)

The cat issue has been resolved. Mittens and her feline colleagues have been successfully relocated to a designated nap zone with fresh tuna and ample sunbeams. Servers are back under human management. Thanks for your paw-tience.

Investigating · April 29 at 4:42 PM (UTC) (1 day earlier)

We're seeing reports that several cats have unionized and are now refusing to leave the keyboards. Our engineers are attempting negotiation via treats and laser pointers. Standby for purr-ogress updates.

Apr 23, 2026

3 months ago

Destroyed Homeworks

laser pointer tracker

Resolved · April 23 at 1:16 PM (UTC) (in 6 hours)

Homeworks have been re-established.

Resolved · April 23 at 7:02 AM (UTC) (6 hours earlier)

After a fight with my Ralph, the cat, the homework for tomorrow has been destroyed.

Mar 23, 2026

4 months ago

Laser Pointer Tracker Issue

laser pointer tracker

Resolved · March 23 at 11:15 AM (UTC)

The laser pointer tracking monitor successfully redirected feline attention away from household assets.

Beam calibration: precise and irresistible.
Engagement rate: 100%.
Human operator fatigue: moderate.
Cat satisfaction level: immeasurable.

Oct 2, 2025

10 months ago

Living Room Chaos

laser pointer tracker

Resolved · October 2 at 12:52 PM (UTC) (in 1 hour)

After intense negotiation and several treats, peace has been restored. The cat is now asleep, purring innocently on the pile of destruction it created. Living room systems back to normal - with minor cosmetic degradation.

Monitoring · October 2 at 12:10 PM (UTC) (41 minutes earlier)

Containment measures deployed: closed doors, gentle “no!” statements, and one decoy toy mouse. The cat appears temporarily distracted, but risk of relapse remains high. All breakable items moved to higher ground (which, unfortunately, is also accessible).

Identified · October 2 at 11:50 AM (UTC) (20 minutes earlier)

Root cause confirmed: one (1) highly energized feline discovered on top of the shelf, eyes wide, tail flicking with malicious glee. Incident traces include claw marks on the couch and an overturned plant.

Investigating · October 2 at 11:42 AM (UTC) (9 minutes earlier)

We’ve detected unusual activity in the living room - scattered cushions, mysterious thuds, and the sound of something fragile definitely not surviving. The team suspects the cat is involved. Further investigation underway.

Sep 25, 2025

10 months ago

Nap Mode Activated

Resolved · September 25 at 9:16 AM (UTC) (in 10 minutes)

The culprit got hungry and woke up. Systems are back. 🐈

Investigating · September 25 at 9:07 AM (UTC) (10 minutes earlier)

System failed because someone fell asleep on the keyboard. 💤